26 weeks and counting!

Two weeks flew by. Now my little lady has a 80-90% chance of survival if anything were to happen. How weird is that? Things are going pretty darn well.

My body:  ~Heartburn is in full effect. I pop antacids like they are going outta style.
                 ~The top of my ribs feel like they are butting into my breast plate.
                  ~Boobs are so big they lay on my belly, I am getting used to the lake of sweat under them.  
                  ~Ligament pain is back in full affect. This is one of those things that I have pretty bad with pregnancy. One would think after all the stretching my body has done, that this wouldn't be as bad. People just don't understand. Nothing helps this but hot baths. Exercise for sure doesn't help. Just walking around the grocery store today had me in so much pain. I came home and took a three hour nap. Luckily Dex was tired, too. How can I describe the feeling to you?? Hmmm...well it feels like someone pulling a ton of rubber bands inward from the outer part of my belly, inward toward the center. Sorta like when you pull a muscle, times ten. The issue is that any time I need to use those muscles, it kills. For instance, bending. This is the not so good part of my day. Picking up toys off the floor, or putting Dex in highchair, or getting him in and outta car. I was told I wasn't even supposed to do these things, but HELLO! I have to. I can have Dex eat at his train table, but we are trying to keep the carpet nice in case he spills anything.
                 ~Hips- this is a great combo with the round ligament pain. Mix hip pain in with that. Worse yet the awkward feeling of your hips floating around in your body, since the ligaments all loosen. It feels like you are a 100 year old, and every time you move, you hear them crack and jiggle around, as well as the shooting pain. (ironically, this is not as bad at work..i think the standing and sitting throughout the day helps, and the fact I don't have to bend down to the floor for anything) At home I am constantly picking up after Dex, and changing diapers, etc. (he has surely gotten bored of the potty at the most inconvenient time) So, work is a thumbs up right now. The only issue there is just bending at shampoo bowl, that isn't too comfy. Luckily my gals are there to help ;-)
                   ~Food~ My appetite still is not huge like it was with Dex. This is so weird, because I was looking forward to eating a ton. I mean, I still love to eat, but it isn't like last time. Sadly not much to report in this arena. Booo...(oh, in case my staff calls me out, I did eat 6 custard donuts with chocolate frosting in two days...but that was because I didn't want them to go bad!) :-P
                     ~Braxton Hicks~ I still get these pretty regularly at night, but the doc eased my mind and just said that's just when my body contracts. They are a lot stronger this pregnancy, and it does take my breath away. They also come on with almost any emotion. If I get excited about something, scared, nervous, upset, angry, giggly, or whatever, it brings on a braxton hicks, so I try to be a robot sometimes, lol.
                       ~Sleeping~ I sleep pretty well, it's just turning and laying on my hips that is not fun. Gonna try the preggo pillow this week. (thanks Clare!)
                         ~Kicking~ Wrenly (btw I grin every time I say her name, so I will be calling her by her full name more-so.) She is so apparent now! Finally!! Only took like 25 weeks! I catch myself feeling in the best mood ever, every time I feel her kick around. I get all happy, giggly, inside. THE BEST PART of being pregnant.

Preggo Comments: I know this is all so cliche...but what the heck makes peoples views of how big you are vary so vastly from each other?! I have people shocked at how big I am, and then others shocked at how small I am. Which is it people? How about, durrrrrrrr, yeah, I have a human in me..I'm gonna look different. I don't feel as huge as I was with Dex. I haven't gained as much as I did with him so far. I think I am up around 16-17 pounds, with around 3 months left.

K, gnight!

Breast feeding nazis. Not cool.

I am writing this post because a friend of mine read my blog the other day about how we choose to formula-feed. She was telling me that she was one of the only moms in her close circle of friends to choose to not breast feed, and had received such negative and hurtful comments. This just pissed me the heck off. Moms may choose whatever they wish for their own child. What gives YOU the right to tell them what they are doing is wrong? What gives YOU the right to tell another mom what YOU think they should feed their child? It's 2012, people. Formula is fine. I was not breast fed. My husband was not breast fed. Are you going to bash my mom, and mother-in-law? Neither of us have medical issues. I have seasonal allergies, my husband has none. What do you care what someone feeds a child that is not yours?(ESPECIALLY A FRIEND!? WHO IS YOUR FRIEND, AND YOU KNOW THEY ARE SMART OR THEY WOULDN'T BE YOUR FRIEND!) What gives you the right to think you are on some pedestal? Did you know that for whatever the choice, it is a private choice. It could be something a mother is upset she cannot do. Maybe the mother can not produce enough, and she feels horribly inept. Maybe she doesn't want to share that with the public. Maybe her baby couldn't latch, and it was terribly upsetting to see your child hungry. Maybe it's because a some women just don't feel comfortable with a baby on their boob. Maybe it's because they got a massive breast infection, and they don't want to endure anything near their breasts, again. For what ever the reason, who are YOU to judge her and make comments? Really?? I find this ridiculous. I say to you, you breast feeding nazis, "you may breast feed, but you are a horribly insensitive person to judge a friend who chooses to do the opposite of you". Shame on you.

http://www.violetblues.com/family-bonding/backlash-for-not-breastfeeding-your-child-287.html

24 weeks in 2 days!

I know I am jumping the gun here, but I am too excited not to. Viability rates sky rocket as of Monday. While the odds are still low, it is nice to know that the baby is growing, and her lungs are slowly getting stronger as well. The chart below show what I am talking about:

at 23 weeks: 10-35% survival rate

at 24 weeks: 40-70% survival rate (so Yay!)

at 25 weeks: 50-80% survival rate(next goal!)

at 26 weeks: 80-90% survival rate(phew!)

at 27 weeks: greater than 90% survival rate (hu!ray!)

My pregnancy is still going smoothly. I have the same old stuff with the last two pregnancies. My hips always are an issue. When I sleep at night, laying on my side puts so much pressure on my hip bones that I can barely get up at night to go to the bathroom. It also takes a minute for me to get outta bed in the morning. The pain is super sharp/shooting/cracky. Once I get up and move around I feel a lot better. My hips sorta get normalized again. This will help explain why: 

The joint between your pelvis (the illium) & your spine (the sacrum) is called the sacroiliac joint(SIJ). Normally the rough, groove like connecting surfaces of the sacrum and ilium interlock and help stabilize the joint. However when you are pregnant the relaxin hormone loosens and widens the joints at the front and back of the pelvis (SIJ and pubic symphysis) which reduces their stability and changes the efficiency of the muscles which attach around that region. Essentially the joint itself is loose, the ligaments become lax, and the muscles which usually stabilize  the pelvis aren't able to work as efficiently. When you put all this together with the increased load on the baby you have an unstable pelvis which often causes pain.

So, the hip stuff only gets worse. Onto the next part of info that involves TMI. I figured since I already went up two cup sizes from Dex, and stayed at that size...that I wouldn't grow anymore up top. WRONG! Growing, growing! I'm going to have to get all new bras, AGAIN! I am literally spilling out of these things. Worst part is that since they are growing again, they won't stop ITCHING! I will be with clients and not realize I am scratching away at my boobs. I had a male client say, "Ya alright over there?" lol. I was like, "Sorry!!" 

Onto Wrenly. She seems like a cool little chick so far. She is quiet, not too energetic, and seems to like matza ball soup, and french onion soup.  I took one sip of these and she kicked me right away. I'm hoping that was a kick of approval, rather than the opposite. She seems to be awake a little bit in the day, but I do feel her more at night, or just notice her more at night. 

I don't have the appetite I did, like I did with Dexter. I can't seem to find things I really want, besides burger king ice-cream, or m&m flurries at Sundaes at the Cottage. Otherwise, this little gal is also a food snob and only wants to eat at fancy restaurants. Sanchez, and the Bistro, are her favorites.  

From her ultrasound pics, she looks smaller than Dexter did. She also looks a lot like Coras 3d pics.  Her room is already for her, and we can't wait to bring her home! Derrick has even been using her name a lot more when talking to people. He calls her by name ;-) He thinks the clothes are so funny because they are pretty much all pink at the moment. Of course. There is a little purple, and green in there too..... She has a wardrobe to last her for a year or more! So exciting that my girlfriend sent me boxes of baby clothes! 

I know my moms friends are eager to purchase gifts for this little one, but clothes are not needed at all! I put up a registry on buy buy baby in case people wanted to know what we would need. Just the basics! I through some fun stuff in, just in case people don't want to get the basics. lol. Diapers/bottles are just a must. I choose to formula feed, so we will need that when the time comes, too. It's just you never know what formula will work best. We had Dex on similac, and that worked great, until I saw there were less expensive brands! Arghh! By the time I figured that out, the doctor said it may be best not to switch. This time I am going to do my research and have it all ready at the hospital, so that I can cut the expense in half. I was able to go back to work after 3 weeks with Dexter, and anyone could feed him, so this worked great. Owning a business, you can't be away too long, even if your staff IS amazing. Not sure how much time I will take off with this one. I would say at least 4 weeks, assuming I won't need a C-section, and things go smoothly. 

I want to enjoy the summer, but I do sorta want it to go by a little quicker...I really want to meet this baby! :-) :-)

She always knows what to say....

With hormones on the rise, and my emotions all astray. I sit and think about my best friend, Laurie. She knows how I feel about her, but sometimes it's nice to hear it, and maybe I want others to hear it, too. I know Laurie will probably have a field day with proof reading this...as I am not great with writing/punctuation..lol ( you know it's true)

Looking back over the years we have come a long way with our friendship. From first grade till now, a lot has changed..as she will laughingly admit to as well. We were at each others houses all the time, and we were the two tiniest gals in class. I'm pretty sure we got on each others nerves quite a bit at an early age. For those of you who know us, can you imagine two extremely young, little girls voicing their opinions all the time? If she said something I didn't like, I would just tell her, and vice versa.(pretty much like how we are today, lol)

 Our friendship circles eventually took different paths, but we came full circle again...I don't know if it was our pregnancy losses at the same time, or if we would have eventually crossed paths again if we didn't go through that, but there must have been some sort of rhyme or reason. Things do happen for a reason.

Many people might not know that when I was in the hospital losing Cora, Laurie was in a hospital, too. She had lost a pregnancy as well. I didn't even know till way later, even when she was coaxing me on the phone about my loss.She was there for me, because even though she was mourning her loss, she felt like what I went through was worse. When she finally told me, I was sorta shocked. I hadn't even known she was pregnant in the first place. Thinking back I can't even recall much because I was in such a crazed state, but I do remember her just knowing exactly what to say. I'm sure I wasn't much help to her at the time...for her loss..A lot of that time was a blur. I wish I could have been better for her at the time as well.

A few months went by, and we were pretty darn close. We were both trying to get pregnant again. Laurie and I agreed that if either of us got pregnant, we had to tell each other right away and not hide it form one another. Laurie corrected me last night that I bullied it outta her...so I got the phone call, first. "Michelle, I took a test, and I'm pregnant again". Me-"oh my gosh! I'm so happy for you!" Me after hanging up- I threw a glass picture frame at the wall. (not my finest moment) Remember, I had just gave birth to my baby two months prior, and had her remains were in a box in my bedroom. Lots of emotions. My freak out made a little more sense when a week later I called her with the same news. "Laurie, I am too!" Mix that post par tum depression with raging pregnancy hormones. What a cocktail. WE WERE PREGNANT AGAIN!

We went through our pregnancies together, and both were pretty rough. We both had some major bleeding scares.Lauries was way scarier. At one point the doctors didn't know if Hudson was going to make it to twenty some weeks. She said they feared she might lose him. Once again, Lauries faith provided her with that same calmness. Here I am freaking out, and she is saying, "I don't have any control over this". Needless to say, our little dudes hung on, and stayed for the long hall. I ended up giving birth a few weeks before poor Laurie, who was really ready to get Hudson out and meet him! It was really fun getting together with our little miracles that took longer than we expected to come. Through loss and life, we got through it, together.

We started talking on the phone a lot, and text messaging. I was eager for her to move back to MI, and was annoying her all the time with "when? when? when will this happen?", and she would say "Michelle, we have to sell our properties, etc, and get things in order, it's gonna take some time". I didn't mind bothering her with my persistence. She kept saying, "probably in three years". I was like, "noooooooooo, it must be sooner." It did end up being sooner and I was so excited!

I remember I was up at Silverlake at the cottage on vacation in July, when I got that first phone call. "Michelle, it's Laurie, Errick has Stage 4 Colo-rectal Cancer." I think that is what she said at least...all I can remember is her calmness, and the words cancer and Errick, in the same sentence. My memory sucks, as Laurie will probably share. I am better with writing the gist of everything. I was trying to keep cool, I'm not sure if I did..I think I burst into tears....and then she said, "I need a haircut asap"..So, I got in the car and drove home, so I could cut her hair ;-) When your friend says something like that, and all she asks is for a trim, you race to get to your scissors as fast as you can.

The rest of Errick and Lauries journey you have all kept up with. I can only say how amazed I am at the both of them. Do you people know that Laurie works full-time?? Do you know she keeps her head on straight enough to do an amazing job at work, and even surpasses sales goals? Do you know that with working full-time, keeping up with doc appointments and scheduling different appointments for her loving husband, they both managed to create a child prodigy?! hehe. He so is. Did you know that even though Errick has endured chemo for the past almost two years now, (is it almost two years now?) he has managed to go to the gym to keep healthy, help his friends with projects around their houses, build train tables for their kids, create artistic crown molding creations in their gorgeous new house, and keep his faith strong?Did you know that Errick cooks for his family?(jealous!) Did you know that Errick had a 15 hour surgery??Can you believe this?? Do you know with everything they are going through, they are still their for ALL of their friends?? They ask for nothing in return but support, and prayers. I don't know where all this energy comes from, but Laurie will tell you she is pretty pooped sometimes, even though she doesn't look it!(seriously, you don't).

They ended up building a home here together after living with her extremely awesome parents when they moved to town. I must bring up her parents here.Lauries mom is such a sweet woman. Her dad cooked them dinner every night, and her mom helped watch Hudson anytime they needed. Marcia, you rule.

Ramble ramble...I know...I just wanted to share how lucky I am to be friends with Laurie, and that I still have a lot of more to learn from her. Sometimes I joke with her that she is a female version of Derrick. Usually when Derrick and I get into an argument, Laurie will understand his side more. Haha, not funny, but true. :-) You can even call her anytime of day, and she will answer. Well, you can't, but maybe I can. lol.

Love you buddy.
Shell

Preggo brain random thoughts

So, this may get a little choppy. I have lots on my mind. First of all let's start with the little man in my life (not Derrick, the other one)

Poor Dex is all sorts of off schedule because of my tiredness. I have been really tired the last two weeks, and I thought it was time to have Dex not nap anymore because he was getting up in the middle of the night a few times, and I figured maybe he wasn't tired....soooooooooo I let him skip his naps so he wouldn't get outta bed. Well, it's ok sometimes, but then I am whipped, and want to sleep, so sometimes I end up putting him down to nap super late, and then he is up till 10pm or later...just because I couldn't get him to nap earlier, because I also like to sleep in still until 9am.  Sooo, it's probably time to start getting us up at 8am and then having him back on  a nap schedule...it's such a pros and cons sorta thing...For 1.) it's nice when he naps earlier and he feels good and things go well etc...but 2.) Sometimes it sucks because we are stuck at home when he naps, and it's hard to coincide with doing things because you have to get home for him to nap, or you can't have a play date because your friends kid naps at a different time...so with no naps, it's sorta fun to be free for the day.

Anyway...i just wanna sleep in the daytime which is not really possible...At least when school gets out my little babysitter can come over! YIPPEE! Basically, the lack of my napping, or Dex napping, leads to both of us being irritable, so I will probably get us up early tomorrow. (crossing fingers I can get outta bed, and that Dex won't hate me for waking him...that is another issue...today I went to get him outta bed at 9am, and he told me to leave and close the door...GROUCH FEST in the morning...just like Daddy ;-)

As for Dexters eating. DO NOT GET ME STARTED. This sore subject alone leaves me aggravated for the whole day. Throwing out food is just normal at our house now. It's great. It's like our new favorite hobby. (note the sarcasm)

Me: Here's a banana
Dex: Yummy nana

The next day, me: Here's a banana
Dex: No like that one. (then spits out into my hand)

REALLY?! It's like that with every meal. Just when he likes something, whether it be a new sandwich with ham or turkey, or hotdogs, or spaghetti, or whatever....he decides he's gonna spit it out and be all dramatic about it. FRUSTRATING. K, enough about that. Don't bother trying to give me advice on this subject. He's beyond help right now. If he so much doesn't like the color of something he won't eat it. He is so particular he goes as far as only wanting certain colored sippy cups. Another annoying subject, especially if the one he wants is already dirty or in the dishwasher.....Can you sense that I am irritable?

Moving on. The pregnancy. 22 Weeks. Things are still moving along. Still not very strong movement from my little girl, she must be very petite. I do feel her but it's just teeny pokes. I felt her on the outside of my belly twice now. I have to be in the right position on my side though. Two more weeks until I get past my mental safety zone!! It seems to be going by pretty fast, at least I think so. I can't wait to get to 24 weeks. It's when I celebrate. BIG milestone.
Unreal. I just looked up the date and it would be April 16th..Ummm that is pretty freaky...That was Coras due date. EXACT due date. SO weird. I don't know what to think about this. I will take it as an amazingly awesome omen/crazy coincidence? K, i'm leaving on that note, and going to bed.